Our 8th round...

So this last round we just had to cancel…….

Everything started out with the “perfect” timing lol… right! I wait and wait for you to come aunt flo. And you finally decide to come so I call our doctors office in Seattle to let them know its cycle day 1 and our day 12 ultrasound lands on a Saturday. Well the clinic here in town is only open Monday through Friday- so I wanted to know if I could do the US on day 11- Friday or day 14 Monday- my doctor said since we are doubling meds he would like it done on day 11 or day 12. So I called my Yakima drs office and my dr was out on vacation until 4/12…. Ofcourse lol so we knew we would have to go to Seattle but then I realized we would have to pack as if we were staying just incase we had follicles and had to do IUI and trigger. So my husband said lets just stay the night that way we don’t have to stress to find a hotel and we could kind of just relax that night.… so we had to go to Seattle for our day 12 ultrasound on 4/7…. Long ugly drive over the pass that morning! … sick to my stomach the closer we get to the dr’s office. So we get our ultrasound done to find out we have follicles but the biggest ones are measuring under 10mm….. so they put us in another room so she could go over our results with our dr and see what they wanted us to do. The nurse came in with another box of Follistim (our injection medication) and said the dr would like you to take this for the next 2 days at the same dosage your are taking now, and then we want you back Monday morning for another Ultrasound. So we stayed in seattle and my husband gave me my injections every day in our hotel room. We headed back to the doctors office knowing that they could have grown or same as last month… not grown much…. I was so nervous and sick to my stomach im sure my husband was the same. We got called back….. Our follicles hadn’t grown much at all… the biggest follicles were still measuring under 10mm…. the nurse asked us to stay in the room and she would go get the PA to talk to us…. As soon as she left the room I started balling… my husband held me as I cried we both knew what this meant. The PA came in the room and explained to us that my follicles were not growing and they want to check my estrogen levels… and if they are high it is good and means my follicles are about to do something so we will keep watching…. And if they are low then we will cancel this cycle. We went to sit back out in the waiting room to wait to be called back for labs… and I cried in the chair in my husband’s arms… I got called back to the lab room…. And I sat in the lab chair and cried… the poor lab lady lol she was rubbing my arm and telling me it will be ok… I was so embarrassed but I assumed they got that a lot being at a fertility clinic. Well we headed back to our hotel packed up and headed home….. on our way home the PA called and they got my lab results back…. My levels were LOW… 34…. She explained that when a woman starts her cycle her levels would be low under 50 and before a woman ovulates it should be high over 100 and when a woman is ovulating it will be over 150- so mine at 34 is very low. She let me know she would talk with the doctor about our next plan… because for some reason now taking more medication we are having less results. Especially this month with taking the femara and taking double the doe of follistim for 5 days instead of 3. So she said she would talk to doctor and possibly talk about switching us back to clomid since we had a mature follicle on just clomid without follistim so maybe trying clomid with follistim. Also possibly putting me on some estrogen boosters…. So that is where we are at…. Waiting to hear from the doctor on what our next plan is. I felt so sad… and defeated… I feel bad and sad that I can’t make my husband a father… when so badly I want to be a mother and he wants to be a father…. So defeated because we don’t understand why the medicine is not working…. It was a long emotionally exhausting weekend….  I love my husband and how supportive he is… and that he is always about “us” and OUR journey and we….. never singling out that it is me…  I love him so much more for that. 

(picture of me in the waiting room in the doctors office, picture of meds in our hotel room, my baby Hayward socks before ultrasound, and follicle pics from the ultrasound)

 

We did enjoy ourselves in Seattle. We got to see my sister and niece. I did buy TJ and I some cheap tickets to the AMA Motorcross as a “I’m sorry I’ve been so bitchy” present from the medication lol… we had a good time but it was pouring rain and COLD!!  Thankfully we found a little kid selling panchos!!! They were a life saver! 

We also had our paint night on Friday night 4/6 that Mandie’s Art Parties hosted the fundraiser and my sweet friend Michele set up for me!! We had so much fun and I was so thankful for family and friends and friends of my guests that went!!! It helped us raise money for our infertility treatments which helps so much… This helps us cover almost half of our medication!!! So Thank you so much to everyone that went! It seriously is so amazing to have all of that support!